Would you rather come for my cafe?

What makes people walk into a congregation? What motivates them to rather participate in a session during the time which they would otherwise be reading the newspaper or catching up with the grapevine?  What makes them leave the warmth of their chairs while sipping a steaming coffee and walking into a room full of strangers to hear about something which they have no clue about?

Could it be personal enlightenment?  

Is it the realization that the need of the hour is to learn something new, constantly?

These are the questions I ask myself every time at the end of each of our cafes.  We borrowed and customized the café concept from Gurteen. It’s not a lecture and it’s definitely not training. It’s about experts casually conversing about some areas of their expertise or about the lessons learnt during a series of projects which they were part of. The experts are more than willing to please and the participants are always more than what we estimate.

We never send out any personal invites or meeting requests but the idea is to send open invitations where people feel free to walk into the venue, pull a chair, hear the expert and by the end of the session share a cup of coffee with the expert and network. So each time at the beginning of every session, we are nail biting and anticipating whether people will turn up or not and (at least till now) it ends up with all of us running around to arrange for additional chairs.  It’s been working out well for us. We have an enthused participation without any compulsion, bonus or relation to KRAs. Perhaps at the end of the next session, we could interview people and ask them what motivates them to be there.   

Time no matter no more, worry no matter no more.

Years, days, minutes, seconds...how irrelevant. As humans we are most comfortable with living within slices of time. And surprisingly it governs everything we do or don't. We reward or punish ourselves in terms of time. And due the milestones which we attach with time, we worry ourselves to death if we don't comply.

After my first diving experience today, it's clear. There is a world where it doesn't matter what age you graduate or if you don't have a job till you're 25 or if you're not married until very late in life or if you haven't had a baby even though your biological clock is speeding away. It doesn't matter if you're beautiful, wealthy or successful. It doesn't matter if your job is sickening or if you have worries that seem to weigh you down all the time.

All that matters in the under water world are the untouched wonders. You start a lifetime experience with a lot of hesitation. But the moment you start to feel what awaits you, you just get it right. To begin with,the moment I had my head under the water for the 1st time, I thought I was short of breath or would stifle but the instructor brought me to the surface for some air and (thankfully!) almost pushed me back again and this time baby I wasn't to give up. 

Its a world of unbelievable colours and life. Life that is so pristine, so vibrant and so real. Nothing matters, just nature, reality and I. I tried to touch so many new things but it seemed to tell me "you can only see, not touch." 

When I was finally out, I was quiet for a long time trying to believe all the beauty I'd seen in a single day. It seemed I was in the water for only 10 minutes but I was stunned to know that I was gone for 30. 

Seriously, Time no matter no more, worry no matter no more. 

Highway on my Pot

While having my dinner today, I was watching Rocky and Mayur's 'Highway on my Plate' and I especially like their show since they snitched the idea that I have always had. The soul of any place is its food. So I had this idea of hosting a travel show where I (a hardcore vegetarian) and Sumit (a more than a hardcore non vegetarian) search for a place's soul through its foods. So we go around searching for how can a vegetarian and non vegetarian survive in this place. 

But no, I don't think I can host this kind of show anymore. 

These guys were in Puri, Orissa. Doing what? Of course they were hogging and hogging and hogging and hogging. And seeing them hog quashed all my dreams of ever nearing such a show ever. 

After my brisk walking session and now relishing my only protein lightly salted dal dinner, my eyes were not prepared to see what I was seeing them do. I cannot subject myself to heaps of glutton glazed in slimy looking oil and slimier spices. There was a heap of rice that sat innocently on their leaf plates soon to change colors as it was bathed in red fiery sinful oily curries, on one's plate there was a vegetarian variety and the other was a non vegetarian. Can't even start to imagine the harm it would do once inside their systems. And as if the main course assault wasn't enough, there were the desserts. Huge rasgullas and gulabjamuns or a mixture of these fallen in the unrighteous extra sugary syrup. I have seen the guys gorge white flour snacks and sweets from different cities, in numerous shows, which are fixed in no other way but deep fried to give you enough piles on the hips.   

I have nothing against Rocky and Mayur, in fact I think they are really good entertainers and more than anything really brave. Subjecting their health to so much torment and yet maintaining a great sense of humor but I pray they are staying away from getting a highway on their respective pets (tummies).

I am now starting to think of a travel show to search for healthy foods in different cities. What say ;-)          

Content?

So the toughest part of any job is to make people understand what you do unless of course you are the CEO.

As for me, I work with content and I work on content and that is so exciting. Every professional in each industry generates content all the time. And still if all this content is not effectively understood, presented, managed, stored, preserved or used…it ends up being reused only by the author in another organization since in the same organization people either do not know that such content ever existed or cannot search for it.

The key for an engineer, doctor, designer, lecturer, writer, strategist, consultant or any other professional is to manage the content which they are generating. It is a critical skill. And content is not only the written word but it is communication in any form. So when people are making videos or recording audios in board rooms, they are actually working on content.

Any person who specializes in content needn't be a remarkable writer but a person with a deep understanding of how communication in any industry can be best captured, presented, searched and made reusable. Before starting to work on generating any content, follow the We, Them and I model.

Start with the ‘we’ of the content - Your target readers and peer group. Structure the content in a way which will be best understood by the ‘we’ group and structure it in the best way that they are to understand. Use terminology which is best understood by your peer group.

Then its them - an unknown audience who may later use your content. Which means your content should be reusable and should also be easily searchable. That also means no reference to people by names, if any, but with their designations/ roles.     

Lastly its I - The last you have to think is ‘I’. And think of I when you start to create the content and are done of thinking about what goes as content. It also means that your content should be free from personal prejudices or opinions. 

Tendencies are usually to focus on the ‘I’ primarily, then ‘we’ and perhaps never think of ‘them’ while creating content. The thinking usually goes - If it appeals to me, it must appeal to my audiences. If you aren't good with user experiences, take feedback from your audiences rather than making those risky assumptions or presumptions. 

We are just not used to seek what we want to find in surroundings which we usually get easily

Recently I read Brad Pitt finds Varanasi staggering. Ashton Kutcher will pose as if spellbound with Vrindavan. Now what exactly are we missing here?

Either these people are too media intimidated to say the truth or wear a special pair of shades, which we Indians are clearly devoid of coz, honestly, all I find these places to be is – only- filthy. And this when I am already used to the rubbish and chaos of metros and everybody’s insensitivity towards it. Come to think of it, not even one person around me is bothered about my peace, the one honking relentlessly or the one trying to break the queue or the one with the most screeching ringtone ever or making the loudest conversation ever. Each person around me is just so not bothered.

What next? Do I book myself to a tranquil holy city holiday hoping it to bring me peace for a few days?

Visit to the holy cities is tormenting. Touts, muck, conmen, holy men haunting you for money… even the slightest thought of peace or anything enchanting cannot touch me. You just want to get out of the place sooner than you came in. Try closing your eyes for a few seconds to chant, the commotion and the fear of being pick pocketed is so overwhelming, that you can’t even feel what the place is or ever was. I am sorry but I cannot pretend to get into a trance or appreciate anyone who has gotten into it after seeing urine, shit and the unfathomable stink from the holy waters. I am no Naipaul but I cannot overlook the obvious. Small conveniences are still so inconvenient, shockingly, considering we are such a powerful economic dynamo.    

On the contrary, I feel peace is where all the westerners hail from. Open clean spaces, nature, cool breeze and silence can give you tranquility and beauty like nothing else. So if they really say the truth about India, they find here what we cannot and we find there what they cannot.

Perhaps we are just not used to seek what we want to find in surroundings which we usually get easily.   

Money, money, money, must be funny, in the rich man's world…

I was confused to hear a moving speech by a friend recently the subject of which was “I want to make money, loads of money. People are doing nothing and making money.”

And it confused me because I started to think why does this person want to make money?

Now don’t give me the ‘is she mad’ look. Of course everybody wants to make money isn’t that obvious? And I know the argument that money buys comforts and to be happy in a country like India you need comforts around you all the time. Do we hear Mukesh Ambani complain of the traffic or Mr. Mittal crib over the power cuts?

But what I was wondering was if this friend wants more money just because everybody else wants it or is there a clear plan as to when, what and how. I think he was doing what most of us do, which is, we have a tendency to follow the brood, without reason and devoid of logic. We think it's the brood and masses are not wrong, so simple isn't it, just follow it. So now I request you to give a minute and honestly think of all the situations that made you happy in the last 10 days.

Your time starts now…

Think, think, think…think hard. Yes, made you happy in the last 10 days.

Good. How many were situations where money made you happy?

As for me, I have definitely been happy on my birthday last week but my happiness didn’t have anything to do with (you guessed it right) anything material. I had many friends and family wishing me and I was truly overwhelmed. I had my facebook page flooded with wishes and all of it had nothing to do with money. I was so happy to interact with some really expressive children who, unfortunately, cannot communicate due to a physical limitation but they communicated with me beautifully. And guess what, no money for that as well. I went for TEDx and heard some really good speakers and that made me a happy person. At work, one of our campaigns got a really good response and I was happy for that (and yes I get my salary but even if the campaign would have been a failure, I’d still be paid).

So perhaps you could argue that buying something really expensive had made you happy, the feeling to be able to afford. Of course it does. But my problem with that and especially in these times is that things are changing so constantly. Just as we are reveling in the pleasure of our new possession there’s already a new edition to make us feel bad. There is no end there…

And my second question is “how much money do you want to make?” and if you are able to give me a number, excellent.  But once you get that number, assure me you won’t change it and ask for more. And also, you won’t ask for health, luck or protection. And you will tell me how did you get to that number and also your plan with that money and will you guarantee me that you will be happy forever after you make that money and not be chasing another brood?

As we grow, our mind gets cluttered. So perhaps it’s simple. I think we just need to unclutter, sit back and reconnect with some basic meanings of happy, health, want, need, desires and money (as individuals and not as a brood) and rethink about what we really want and in what proportions.

A place called home...

Words confuse me.

No, seriously.

Now take for example the word home. The dictionary throws meanings like shelter or, interestingly enough, the place in which one's domestic affections are centered or as they famously say, home is where the heart is. Even a tree can provide shelter but that's not home. And the plush room of an ultra-luxurious 5 star hotel will definitely be a place where my affection will be centered, domestic or undomestic I don't care, but that's not home either.

So in my quest to understand the meaning of home, I asked myself: At the end of a tiring day, where is it that I look forward to reach?

Obviously, the answer is home but why?

Do I have a spa waiting at home or a red velvety carpet that will lead to a king sized squashy bed and soft pillows that will devour me along with my fatigue? I wish there was but none of that is the reason I want to reach home.

So first of all, when I head back home, I look forward to see an affectionate and smiling face with whom I can discuss my tiny and honest details of the day. It’s the space where I can be with no formalities or rules. The place which is comfortable and soothing and not necessarily huge, plush or has the most expensive interiors which I can exhibit to my friends and foes. If that was the case, the best home would be the premium luxury deluxe hotel rooms. Remember after a long vacation, we still look forward to come home. It's a place where I find relief, the same kind of relief which I find after applying an ice pack on a burnt finger or after having received an unexpected bank interest when am almost broke.

I now understand that home is a place of peace, relief and comfort irrespective of the number of rooms or the exquisite and costly interiors. It's a place where we feel grounded and content. We create a home and cannot buy it. It is not a hotel and it needn't be a palace. If there is no peace, comfort or relief, even the most spacious and opulent homes will feel like a prison and we will just keep running away from it either for frequent and relaxing holidays or in search of better homes.