Not my city, not anymore

The fast paced unsafe life. Access to the best of everything high-class glazed in artificiality. The well-connected always herded metro. The unsatiable desire for conveniences leading to growing stress. This is the city of Delhi, which I refrain from calling ‘my’ city. I feel I don’t belong here. 

On one hand while it has become home to MNCs and giants which have world-class and multistoried offices with chic coffee shops nuzzled in every corner. There is insane traffic and road rage to get to these offices, every single day. While there is an excellent network of highways and flyovers with ingenious design all over the city, there is no check on the alarmingly growing number of cars and unmanageable traffic which make all the resources always insufficient. 

There are the best of international brands in premiere malls and markets, which are vulnerable to bomb blasts. And there are the finest restaurants and pubs all over the city but no safety guaranteed for women going to such places or going anywhere in the city for that matter. Forget about women, even small girls are subject to barbarism. The capital city, hub of the passive Central Government and also the breeding ground for parasitic criminals who get more confident of getting away because of the lack of action and failing of every system. And to top it all there is the affluent feigned class competing to get more affluent than the most affluent and mercilessly squashing the laws with money.         

 I don’t feel safe here, at any time. This is not my city, not anymore.   

Have you met the insensitive, crude, uncivilized and selfish?

Thanking the pantry boy for the coffee, waiting for people to get out of the elevator before you get in, holding the door for someone coming behind you, saying sorry to the person you accidentally step on, offering chair to an elderly person, helping your colleague with something which you are good at without them even asking for it, helping a new employee who apparently seems lost, keeping your mobile on the silent mode while in a meeting or movie…why should any of these things matter?

Tell me why should any of it seriously matter when we are living in a country where we are constantly fighting for resources and carry the same attitude to work every single day. We are in the 'me first' race be it on the roads or waiting in a queue or meeting the deadlines. I will be measured on my KRAs, targets and what my boss and boss’ boss thinks about me and nothing else. As I walk on the road, I am not obliged to help strangers or in my organization I am not bound to assist random colleagues. I get nothing in return and it won’t fetch me any reward either. 

When you see this attitude every single day, you can’t help but wonder what kind of people are we dealing with? And at times when patience runs out, you want to be like them to deal with them. But then, something pulls you back soon enough and you feel a disgust for these people all over again. Insensitive, crude, uncivilized and selfish is what you call them. But then what is it that pulls back?

These are all acts of generosity. Though minuscule  but these are so so important in making the person who you are every single day. These small generosities are making you a very content and fulfilled person. And this is not for anybody else but yourself. So irrespective, please keep your generosity intact. 

The big WHY

Simon Sinek, I love this guy (and he’s cute too). 

As I spend almost most of the day listening to him, I am so inspired by what he has to say. I am so so inspired to find the ‘why’ do I do what I do (and trust me it’s a difficult drill). Unless I find that, just doing meaningless work doesn’t make sense. Once you are able to find the ‘why’ do I do the work which I do,only then, can I believe in it, talk to people around me about it and innately have trust of people who believe in my why. You don’t need gigantic organizations or impressive degrees to make your credentials reliable but be crystal clear about why are you in the job which you are. 

It has made me also think, during an interview (which are normally short and there’s a tendency to just concentrate on what you do and how you do it) just how do you gauge a candidate or the organization which you aspire to join. The candidates exaggerate what they do and how brilliant they exactly are, the organizations too boast of how great they are and what great employee benefits they provide compared to their competitors. But where are the whys? Tell me would you hire a self-obsessed manipulative university topper? But then at the time of hiring you are just so amazed with that person’s scores. Do you hire people because they will work for your money or really passionate about the organization’s vision and are absolutely clear about how will they contribute towards it? No one really questions or answers the 'why' during those short interviews.

As for me, I still have to start my why quest but I am definite that I will, soon. 

My Profile

Time to switch off

It was that time of the week again. The time when you feel the lowest low, overloaded with cluttered thoughts and guilt of having overindulged during the weekend, not to forget the strange load weighing you down. Monday wasn't exactly her day; it was a day all the pressure exploded all at once. The pressure of combating the raging traffic, pressure of sharpening your fangs sharper than the last week to fight meaner manipulations, the harsher sun, the endless meetings where only the screechiest is heard and the perpetual wait for the next weekend.

While crawling through the snarling traffic, she thought of the 9:30 am meeting for which she would definitely be late. And this particular meeting was something which she definitely wasn't looking forward to. There was expected to be, if not more, a lot of mudslinging with no one really ready to take onus. The uninteresting meeting was to be followed with the final reviews of this particular assignment with its deadline approaching soon. The hurried lunch was to be followed with a meeting of a pile on responsibility which was inflicted upon her. It was then compiling the status reports and making the presentation for the next review meeting which was 2 days later. The day was so packed that just the thought of it was making her sick.

To overcome the sickness, she thought of the weekend that just went hoping to feel better. She sadly realized she hadn't joined the yoga classes she was planning to or visit her ailing granny. And she hadn't had the time to clean up the closet.

Why and just why there were only things to be done.

It was an instant decision. She turned back from the next turn, dropped an SMS to her boss and had a satisfied smile. The next was to switch off her official phone. And there she was headed to her favorite café from her college days. Even the thought of indulging in her favorite cheese sandwich and fruit punch was so exhilarating. It was time for a day of redemption even if it meant just 8 hours of it. Some time off for her thoughts and nostalgia. And work, well, what great difference could just a day make.      

Take control and take it now

It is so amazing when you know that you can control your mind. It is the most enlivening and liberating feeling. Just the same feeling which you have on the last day of your exam or being unexpectedly served your favorite gooey cake when visiting somebody’s place.

If you really ask me, it is an art. The state, in which, you are able to shut off the surroundings and people around you.  Becoming unaffected and callous to situations, unless of course something physically hurts you. Smiling to yourself at the achievement. And telling your mind, so now that I have your attention I can make you read and do something towards what I wish to ultimately do in life.

So that’s how you have to work towards that skill of controlling your mind. Think of what you really (really, really) want to do in the next one year, 5 years and life? And now think if any of which what you are doing or thinking now is helping you achieve what you so need to do? If not, drop it immediately. It is totally so not worth your time. Take control of what belongs to you, your mind, your thoughts and the days to come. The rest is only and just worth ignorance.

So go ahead, take control now. 

Addicted to the smell of new books?

No online experience can match it. Sorry Flipkart, you fail.

As I walked into a bookshop today, I felt it. The amazing experience…the splash of colors, the distinct smell and the thrill of exploring a treasure. Yes, I have this experience every time I have walked into a bookshop. Online shopping is cool but it can never give me the plethora of so many colors, the warmth and the intoxicating smell of new books. I have known a lot of people to be addicted to that smell and probably some have written about it. It truly is inebriating…you just don’t feel like leaving the place. Simon Sinek is so right in his talk that technology can only make things go fast but it can’t replace the experience. You have to, have to experience.

My separation with the bookshop, like always, was tough. As tough as fitting all the books in the bookshelf of my apartment is getting. And you may want to share them but you don’t want to part with them.

Looks like it’s a month of talking about my passions…first music and now books.

If life would give me that opportunity, I will more than keenly just snatch it. Days where on a huge couch I can have music on my earphones, the book and its exalting smell along with the aroma of freshly ground coffee…heaven, bliss! I don’t understand why would people need to look for other pleasures. Ah yes, added to that if I could have my 40 minutes on the treadmill, fresh salads and chatting sessions with Sumit, moms and dads. Life...! 

Go, get your wings

I am truly amazed at its power. I have been perturbed, bothered and irritated for reasons that are important to me but which when I share with others are just reduced to being minuscule or something I have to be patient about. It’s only then I turn to it and why do I? Doubtlessly for its overbearing power to pull me out of my current state and at least get me back to normalcy.  I take a bow for its greatness, various forms and profoundness.  

I bow to Music, in all its kinds, forms and varieties.

So many variations, so many languages, so many notes (high and low) all in a concoction of so many different lyrics. Lyrics which have the mystical ability to connect me with god and see beyond or make me introspect or make me see the supernatural.  Lyrics which unlock my otherwise tormented imagination and I see myself afloat and liberated, liberated from time, expectations and everything socially righteous. Lyrics so deep that they make me euphoric, so euphoric that I cry as they touch my deepest thoughts.  

So many rhythms wedded to perfect beats and the voice of the artist, sweet voice.  The impeccable rhythmic creation which has the immense and amazing power to entice me out of an emotional turmoil and carry in a melodious realm. The beats which make me want to dance as if there is no tomorrow, dance as though there no worries and discover myself in the movements. Beats which make me feel free, free from everything stifling and my own shortcomings. 

Music is so so powerful. It connects you and me, it connects me with god, it connects me with the real and the unreal and it connects me with me.